Crunchy Soup

25 Jul
Yes. You read my heading correctly. Last night, Lisa and I decided to join a few friends to go swimming. After working up an appetite, we came home and I got out a can of soup.
95% fat free Clam Chowder (clue #1).
I poured the thick soup into a sauce pan, and heated it. I know, even I can heat canned soup. Genius.
 I knew I wasn’t going to like it because I have this weird thing with soup. Soup reminds me of vomit. Don’t tell me you haven’t looked into a bowl of chunky clam chowder or shrimp bisque and DIDN’T think it looked like something your vomited up one time your sophomore (after too much jungle juice perhaps)
TANGENT: One time, my junior year of college, my best friend Ashley vomited after to much partying and threw up on my fake ugg boots. (Hope you’re reading Ash 🙂
ANYWAYS, after heating my soup, I sat next to Lisa and dug into my seafood chowder. Then it happened. Lisa was talking about something, and I start chewing… and I bit down on something… Crunchy. I kept chewing, slowly… And it kept crunching on my teeth! Clearly Lisa heard the crunch within my mouth and gave me a horrified look. I got up, spit the soup out, and tried not to cry myself to sleep thinking I ate a baby sea turtle or something.
I still had a craving for the tasty sea, so I popped open a can of tuna and dug in.

Un-crunchy tuna

I haven’t seen Lisa since Monday, which to us that’s like a life time. We have separation anxiety from each other. Thank God her Husband, TJ and Wayne work together (convenient much!?)  so we’re usually together when out Men are out working, playing paintball, or just being stupid together.

So I was able to catch up with Leese, while she shoved her face full of vodka infused whip creme

This is her full time job.

Ok, she only had a little. I squirt some into my mouth (don’t be dirty) and swished my mouth with Diet Coke- think diet coke and vanilla vodka… But I squirted to much whip creme and it almost came out of my nose. Not cute.

Our men came home from a grueling session of paintball and atomic wings (NOTE TO READERS: DO NOT KISS ANYONE AFTER ATOMIC WINGS!!!!!) Ouchies…

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